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Summary of Question:	Is sex okay within the context of a marriage?
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Monday, 10/16/2000 1:13 PM MDT

I have met a wonderful Amritdhari woman whom I am considering for marrige. She is unlike any other woman I have met. Not only is she strong and independent but she is so warm and compassianate... but, she considers sex within a marriage filty and sinful...." sex is for procreation only". I don't have a problem at all in her being a sikh and pure, but I don't comprehend her reasoning? What does the Bani say of sex between a consenting sikh man and a sikh woman within a marriage. She says the Bani say otherwise. I don't believe that marriage is a licence to have sex, and I don't believe in giving into all your desires, but her "extreme poicy", has got me worried. From my sikh upbringing, I believe sex is something sacred and special that two loving people share...and I can't get her to understand that....Please help me....I think she is the woman I want to marry, but if she doesn't budge, she will loose me.

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Reply
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You are so right. Physical intimacy in a marriage relationship is very healthy. It gives relaxation and warmth. It is a very special bond for the married couple through which they can continue to expand their union and experience freshness and renewal in this challenging life.

How can you call the act of union that creates a new born sinful? If that act is sinful then so must be the product of that act. This woman has a great deal of fear or guilt. Passion is very important. We are human beings with all range of feelings and expression. We can express our love of God,,,,but we were created by God as souls in a human body....so we have been blessed with this human experience. Angels long for a physical body to experience life.

Marriage is very challenging without starting out with this rigid and cold attitude. Do you want to be celibate?

It seems that this woman is not really interested in marriage. Look again....there are many other "fish" in the sea.

God bless you