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Summary of Question:	Ardas
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Wednesday, 7/10/2002 10:19 AM MDT

SSA

I am facing a difficult situation in my life and i am not sure what to do. I will not get into the details of my specific problem..but it has been something that i have lived with for many years. This problem has caused me nothing but grief, frustration and many tears. As a Sikh i know that it is important to go out and try ones best..for God helps those who help themselves. Believe me i have tried everything and nothing has worked. I have prayed for so many years and still my prayer has not been fulfilled. I waxed and waned from my faith so much because of this sitation. Sometimes i believe so much and pray with all of my heart but then the frustration sets in that having prayed for so many years...my prayer has still not been answered. Sometimes i question whether i am being punished by God by having this problem. I am facing an important decision in my life regarding marriage and i have decided that if my prayer is not fulfilled by the end of this year...i will not marry anyone...even though it will hurt my parents and a certain person who i know cares deeply for me. I feel terrible when i say this...who am i to give Waheguru an ultimatum...but i am tired of this problem..this wait...He knows that this problem has caused me nothing but grief, he has seen me cry so many nights by myself, why doesn't he help me?

Please help me i don't know what to do. I recite ardas in the hopes that my prayers will be answered, i used to recite my banis everyday...but i am ashamed to say that as this problem remains..i haven't been reciting my prayers with the same frequency.

I would apprecitate your advice on my situation. Thank you

KK
(REPLY) We are each born on this Earth because we have lessons to learn, -- karma to work out until/before we can merge back into the divine source of all life, Akal Purkh. Whatever problems you have and the suffering you are experiencing are challenges that your soul chose to confront in this lifetime. To expect God to remove the problems without your solving them, is like asking the teacher in the classroom to do your homework for you, and/or answer the test questions. We do our banis, and read from Siri Guru Granth Sahib in order to elevate our consciousness, purify our minds, and put us in tune with God's will, so to discontinue these practices is to fail to use tools that Guru's grace has given us with which to understand the meaning of life and to keep reminding us to keep everything in perspective. You need to be true to yourself, whatever that may be, and life your life as righeously as you can - to please God and Guru -- not to please other people. God doesn't punish people, we punish ourselves. God gives us breath and life, and the opportunity to discover His presence living in us. He also created the maya that we get involved in. My humble suggestion is that you pray to Guru Ram Das, the Lord of Miracles for clarity and understanding (!) so that rather than asking God to solve your problem, I think you need to understand what it is, and why you have it, and then deal with it. May God and Guru bless you with wisdom and courage. "It's not the life that matters, it's the courage that you bring to it." SP