Previous

Next

Ask a Question

Summary of Question:	Im Lost And Confused
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Tuesday, 7/09/2002 1:39 PM MDT

k..im 17 yrs old an im reely confused.

my parents r reely strict with me..and no1 seems to understand...i feel alone. ive felt like this for a long time and dnt know wot to do. it soundz silly but its true. sometimes i feel trapped and want to do what other ppl do but then i dnt like the other people newayz coz they aint true to who they are. if that makes sense.
also i wnt 2 b more relegious but my family isnt. i got long hair..but thats due to tradition not relegion..4 me i wnt to keep it for relegion..i want to learn more and go gudwara more but we hardly ever go..which is reely bad. my parents are strict due to tradition and i get where they comin from..jus feel lonely. and i theres this person i felt i liked a lot...a guy...but i know nothing wnt happen..coz he dnt want it to...and i dnt think i cud betray my parents...their trust even tho bare ppl do..i just cant. i only want a meainingful relationship...not just for the sake of it...i cant stop thinkin of him..even though hes gone and ill never see him again..i cnt help my feelings and i wnt them to stop.
i aint on friendly terms with a lot of people due to my 'attitude prob'..lolz...and i dnt even kno ne1 outside skool...and my friends know a lot of people and have their cousins...i dnt even have that due to family fights and friction..all ma friends have their contacts..and i jus feel more alone..they're all i have//what if that goes from me? and im soooo shy....my face just goes so red wen chatting 2 sum1 new or in public..i jus dnt know wot 2 do....basically...im reely confused and feel like there no point nething...i cnt even be bothered to study..i have no energy...i feel lonely and confused and want to do something about it but i dnt know wot. i guess u mite not even have an answer for me...i just felt like writing this..theres so much more to confusion and loneliness..its just hard to put down what i feel and why because i dont know how to explain it.

___________________________________________________________________________

Sat Siri Akal

Dear One,

It's hard being 17. Being a teenager is really really tough and you have a lot of added pressures living in a strict modern family in a crazy modern world. We all long for companionship. It's a perfectly natural and normal feeling. The question is - how can we handle that longing gracefully, and in a way that will elevate our spirits?

If you want to know true companionship, then you need to experience the companionship of your own soul through the practice of meditation and singing Gurbani. That relationship - between you and the Divine - will anchor you in life and give you guidance in all other relationships. This can be a lonely and difficult journey, but if you take one step towards the Guru - the Guru will take thousands of steps to you. Find ways to go to Gurwara more often. Have a friend take you if your parents won't. Wake up before the sunrise, take a cold shower and meditate on WaheGuru. Recite Japji every day. If you don't have other shabds to meditate on, there are so many Shabds on SikhNet that you can download and print. Study them, read them - let the words of the Guru awaken your true heart. If you give yourself this chance, you will never need to feel lonely again because God does exist and the Guru will lead you to the experience of it. All other relationships are impermanent anyway. Every other relationship in life will eventually come to an end. But the relationship between your soul and God, as given by the Guru - will see you through life, death and beyond.

God bless you. My prayers are with you.


GPK